I never knew what normal was
I guess I never will
I did not grow up normal
When everyone else seemed to be living normal lives
I'd pray to my Cyndi Lauper poster
Another un-normal girl
Just like me
For once, just once
Could someone just accept me as I am?
Instead, my prayers were answered
By a drunk man and woman
Beatin' down my door
And each other
And instead of facing reality
I'd hide in my imagination
Where nobody could hurt me
Or find me

Now as an adult
I see there is
No such thing as normal
Nobody is perfect
No life is perfect
Nothing is perfect
There is no perfect
Its just an illusion
Set up by man
To hide our faults
And our darknesses
And what happens
Behind closed doors

"Be ashamed
Very ashamed
You're a freak
And nobody wants you"
This was the message of my childhood
That was spoken in broken words
Between drinks
Evil words
And battered threats

But the reality?
Is that this is all too common
Its regular business
That abuse
"You aren't worth it
You are nothing"
Narcissism
And alcoholism
Say

You know what I say?
Fuck you, that's what I say
Fuck that shit
Fuck that noise
Fuck it all
Abuse is a dirty little bitch
That I no longer want any part of
I am ready for change

I am too old
Too wise
Too tired of all the games
That idiots play
I might love those idiots
But that doesn't stop them
From being idiots nonetheless
I am charge now bitches
I am the new normal

Bent, but not broken
Cracked, but not cracked up
Used, but not used up
Worn, but not too worn out
I still have enough in me to beat this thing
To walk away with my dignity
And honor
And love
To walk away
And morph
Into someone brand new

Its time.

Its time.

Its about fucking time.

- © Girl Lost 2013