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One Step Closer

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Yesterday my husband went down to her house and had her sign the papers so I could get control of my own life insurance policy.  I was a nervous wreck.  She lives a block away, and I've successfully avoided seeing her, minus three times:
  1. She used to drive past my house honking and yelling things at me while I was inside.  I looked out to see her doing it once. 
  2. I drove past her house, and she was outside, staring at us.
  3. We drove past her coming out of a store we both shop it.  We kept driving, and she waited to leave until we were completely out of sight.  
But in this past year and 3 months, I haven't spoken to her once.  So when my husband had to go visit her yesterday to have her sign the papers, I felt horrid.  But he was back in literally seven minutes, and he said it went fine.  She was cordial to him, and signed the papers with ease.  I was so glad there was no guilt trips, no anger, nothing.  Phew!  

He was scared to death, though.  But it ended up being okay.  Now I am hoping she doesn't take this as an opening to contact me again.  


But if she does, I am going through ideas of what to say to her if I have to talk to her.  We're going to have a moving sale tomorrow (hopefully, if it doesn't rain!) 

But, she signed the papers with no objections, and I sent in all the paperwork yesterday (I sent in the first batch the week before), so hopefully they'll issue us the money before we move, because we'll need it!  <3  

So, this is one step closer to healing, to moving away from here, from all the bad memories (and lots of good ones, which makes me sad), and finding a new life in another state, with a new perspective.  I will never run into anyone I know, asking me "How's your mother?" or will I have to talk about her if I don't want to.  I can start a new life, on 20 acres of gorgeous land.  

Granted, my horrid narcissistic birthfather lives there, but he doesn't know we're coming, nor will he know, unless someone lets it slip.  And if that happens, it's okay, because I don't have to have anything to do with him.  It's a small town, with larger town all around it.  So I can spend a majority of my time when I am way from home, not even in the town where we live.  

But even with all that, it's worth it, just to be away from this town and everyone that knows my family. 

One step closer.  

Next, is my moving sale!  



About Post Author

Living life with with a narcissistic parent is one of the hardest things a child can do. Because narcissism doesn't stop with mom and dad, it usually bleeds through the entire extended family dymanic. And the abuse travels with us into adulthood, usually either until the narcissist dies or we go no contact. And usually, our abuse is never talked about, for fear of retaliation or judgment. So I am breaking my silence and showing the world what my mother's abuse looks like so maybe others will feel strong enough to do the same.

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Welcome to Girl Lost.


I am a daughter of a narcissistic mother, one of way too many in this world. If you're here, then you have one too. I hope by reading my words someone out there will realize they aren't alone.

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